pregnancy intimacy Archives - Johanna Canady - Doula Services

Pregnancy couple goals

Have Yourself a Minimalist Christmas

With Christmas fast approaching, I’ve been thinking a lot about what this season truly means to me. Last month, my book club read Have Yourself a Minimalist Christmas by Meg …

Johanna Canady

"Hi, and welcome to The Doula Johanna Podcast! I'm Johanna, a birth doula, university coordinator, and mom of three based in Munich, Germany. Life here is beautifully chaotic as I juggle supporting families, raising my own, and exploring new paths like end-of-life doula work. This podcast is about doulaing yourself in every phase of life with compassion and kindness. I’m so glad you’re here!

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doulajohanna

Birth Doula for Expat Families in Munich
🎙️ Host of The Doula Johanna Podcast
💞 Intimacy & Connection for Parents
🌱 Aspiring End-of-Life Doula

Why Sobriety is a Gift ✨⁠ ⁠ When we drink an

Why Sobriety is a Gift ✨⁠
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When we drink and when we don't, has been a lot on my mind lately. Taking care of ourselves isn’t just for pregnancy or life’s big milestones—it’s something we deserve every single day.⁠
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In our culture, drinking has become so normalized. It’s the go-to for relaxation, celebration, and unwinding after a long day. For years, I thought of alcohol as an essential part of the fun—until my mid twenties, when conversations with my favourite uncle opened my eyes to its darker side. He spent most of his life battling alcoholism, only finding sobriety 18 months before he unfortunately passed away from lung cancer. Those conversations taught me so much: sometimes, the things we think help us cope, that seem like such a normal part of our every day life, can quietly take more than they give.⁠
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At first, to me giving up alcohol for stretches of time was about avoiding health risks—but it felt like sacrificing fun and joy. It wasn’t until my pregnancies and nursing journeys which brought long stretches of sobriety that I realized: being sober isn’t a burden. It’s a gift. It’s clarity, connection, and a chance to feel life more deeply.⁠
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This week’s podcast episode is a heartfelt invitation to try a month without alcohol. Not as a rule, but as an act of radical self-care. You might just discover a new level of peace, joy, and connection waiting for you on the other side.⁠
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Tune in now to explore the surprising benefits of ditching alcohol and what it means to truly care for yourself.⁠
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If this episode resonates, share it with a friend who might need a little encouragement too. I would really appreciate your support.⁠
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#SelfCareJourney #BeYourOwnLifeDoula #SobrietyIsAGift #AlcoholFreeLiving #SoberCurious #LivingMyBestLife

Books have always been my sanctuary—where I go f

Books have always been my sanctuary—where I go for inspiration, growth, and sometimes just a little escape. But this past year, five books didn’t just entertain me—they changed how I approach life. That's why I dedicated a whole podcast episode to my key takeaways.⁠
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✨ Atomic Habits taught me the power of small, consistent actions.⁠
✨ Sink Reflections showed me how progress beats perfection every time.⁠
✨ The Magic of Thinking Big reminded me to dream boldly and break through limits.⁠
✨ I Will Teach You to Be Rich gave me confidence and clarity in handling finances.⁠
✨ Womb deepened my understanding of honoring my body’s rhythms.⁠
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Reading alone is transformative, but sharing and reflecting in community? That’s where the real magic happens. These books shaped my year because I had the chance to talk about them with others—and it made their lessons even more profound.⁠
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That’s why I’m dreaming of creating a space where we can connect over life-changing books together. A community where we reflect, support, and grow.⁠
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What books shaped your year? Drop your favorites below—I’d love to know! ⁠
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PS: Whoever can tell me how many times I said "gamechanger⁠" during my last episode will receive a free copy of "Growing together", the prompt collection I created for expecting parents ;) ⁠
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#BookLovers #GrowthOverPerfection #MindfulLiving #BookCommunity⁠
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Picture by @doulaheart_photography

🌿 Death. Just the word can feel heavy, uncomfor

🌿 Death. Just the word can feel heavy, uncomfortable, or even a little scary. I’m not an expert, but it’s a topic that has been calling to me for years—and I believe it’s something we all need to talk about more.⁠
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In my latest podcast episode, I share why I’ve decided to start the journey to becoming an end-of-life doula. I talk about:⁠
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> How caring for my uncle in hospice shifted my perspective on dying.⁠
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> The parallels I see between birth and death—and how both have been pushed out of our everyday lives.⁠
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> My personal hope to show up for loved ones with courage and understanding when the time comes.⁠
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> And why I believe we all deserve to make our one chance at having a good death as meaningful and supported as possible.⁠
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This episode isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about starting a conversation. Let’s get curious together and explore how we can face death with less fear and more connection.⁠
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I’d love to hear your thoughts. What’s one question you’ve always had about death or dying?⁠
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🎧 Tune in to Episode 4 of The Doula Johanna Podcast wherever you listen to podcasts.⁠
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#EndOfLifeDoula #DeathPositivity #FacingDeath #CuriousNotAfraid #TheDoulaJohannaPodcast

Happy New Year, dear friends! 🎉⁠ ⁠ 2025 is

Happy New Year, dear friends! 🎉⁠
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2025 is here, and I couldn’t be more excited to dive into it with you! This year, I’m inviting all of you to join me in setting intentional, meaningful goals for the year ahead.⁠
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In my newest podcast episode, I’m sharing my personal process for identifying “the one thing” that will have the most positive impact in both my personal and professional life this year. Spoiler alert:⁠
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✨ For my personal life, I’m focusing on my marriage by committing to a monthly date night with my husband. With the hustle and bustle of work and family life, it’s so easy to let quality time slip away. But strengthening this foundation is essential to everything else in my life. ❤️⁠
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✨ For my work, my one thing is podcasting weekly. 🎙️ I truly believe that showing up consistently will not only help me grow as a creator but also allow me to connect with more of you, share valuable insights, and create a community around topics I’m really passionate about. From personal growth to family, career, and end-of-life topics. This podcast is my way of bringing something meaningful to the world—and I can’t wait to see where it takes me this year!⁠
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So, what’s your one thing for 2025? What goal or habit could change everything for you if you focused on it? Share your ideas below, or tune in to the episode and let’s set our goals together. Let’s make 2025 another year we grow, connect, and thrive.⁠
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Link to the episode in my stories and my linktree ⁠
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Picture by @doulaheart_photography ❤️⁠
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#NewYearGoals #TheDoulaJohannaPodcast #IntentionalLiving #2025Goals #TheOneThing

In the second episode of The Doula Johanna Podcast

In the second episode of The Doula Johanna Podcast, I’m opening up about money: the mistakes I’ve made, the insights I’ve gained, and how I’ve started to take responsibility for my finances in a whole new way.⁠
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I’m not a financial expert—far from it. Honestly, money has always been a tricky subject for me. I carry around with me a plethora of unhelpful beliefs about money and people who have it. But this past year, I’ve learned some powerful lessons (mostly the hard way!) that completely shifted my perspective.⁠
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Money can feel overwhelming, especially when negative beliefs or past decisions weigh us down. But I’ve realized that by talking openly about our challenges, we not only lighten the load—we also inspire others to take control of their own stories.⁠
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A couple weeks ago, I had a conversation with my daughters about what we would do if we had a million Euro. We had so much fun dreaming and I was impressed with their creativity. I cannot wait for the day when money will feel that joyful and inspirational in real life.⁠
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What would you do if you received a million bucks today? ⁠
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If you’re ready to tackle your own money mindset or just curious to hear my journey, tune in now! The episode is live on Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen to podcasts.⁠
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Let’s grow together and rewrite our money stories.⁠
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Tag someone who needs a little financial inspiration today!

It’s here! My podcast has officially launched! 🎉⁠
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I’m beyond excited to share the first episode of The Doula Johanna Podcast with you. This project has been on my heart for so long, and it’s finally out in the world.⁠
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The podcast is about being your own life doula—a concept that grew from my own experiences and those of my clients. So often, we put our kids, our work, and everyone else first. Even during pregnancy, when we pay more attention to ourselves, it’s often more about the baby than truly about us. I realized I wanted to change that for myself, and I hope other women will relate. By regularly holding space for ourselves, we can inspire others to do the same.⁠
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Starting this podcast was nerve-wracking—I thought that everything had to be perfect. Then I heard the best advice from a podcast coach: “Your first episode will always be the shittiest one. Don’t wait for perfection.”⁠
That was the permission I needed to dive in and just start.⁠
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In Episode 1, I talk about how I use the Wheel of Life to doula myself through different seasons of life. It’s practical, personal, and filled with insights to help you do the same.⁠
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You can listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you find your favorite shows. It’s also available on YouTube if you prefer to watch me struggle with the camera while talking :) ⁠
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Thank you for being here and supporting this new adventure. I’d love for you to tune in, share your thoughts, and let me know how you doula yourself!⁠
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Have you ever thought about what it means to hold space for yourself? Let me know in the comments! And don’t forget to share the episode with a friend—it means the world to me.⁠
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Let’s do this! 💕⁠
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#PodcastLaunch #TheDoulaJohannaPodcast #BeYourOwnDoula #SelfCareJourney #PersonalGrowth #LifeDoula #PodcastCommunity⁠
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Photo by @doulaheart_photography

Over the past months, I’ve reflected deeply on m

Over the past months, I’ve reflected deeply on my work as a doula and what truly feels urgent to me. At the heart of everything I do is connection—helping people strengthen their relationships and navigate life’s most transformative moments.

For years, I’ve felt a quiet calling to explore end-of-life doula work—a path I can no longer ignore. I am finally honoring this calling. Next years, I’ll start volunteering at a hospice in Munich. My hope is that within the next couple of years I will be able to support the beginning of life as well as the end of life.

With this shift, I’ve decided to focus on what aligns most with my purpose. While I’ll continue to support my birth clients with a postpartum visit, I’m stepping back from extended postpartum care. A decision that doesn't come easy to me. I might also step back from childbirth education classes, at least for a while and focus on creating a new class on intimacy for parents instead.

This process of finding my focus is as beautiful as it is uncomfortable and challenging. I am so grateful for all the wonderful people I have in my life who inspire and support me.

Thank you for being part of this journey with me—I can’t wait to share what’s ahead. ❤️

🌟 What about you? What feels most urgent and meaningful in your life right now? Let’s start a conversation in the comments.

#DoulaLife
#EndOfLifeDoula
#BirthDoula
#LifeTransitions
#ParentingJourney
#IntimacyAndConnection
#PersonalGrowthJourney
#LivingWithIntention
#DoulaCommunity
#MunichDoula

🎄 With Christmas around the corner, I’ve been

🎄 With Christmas around the corner, I’ve been reflecting on what this season really means to me. Last month, my book club did "Have Yourself a Minimalist Christmas" by @megnordmann (shout out to @lawofattractionchangedmylife) , and it struck a chord. What makes the season really special to me is baking cookies with my three daughters (even though it's always a giant mess and at least one of us will have a proper meltdown), listening to German, English and Polish christmas songs and spending cozy time with my husband on the couch. I don’t want more things—I want more time, connection, and joy with the people I love most.⁠
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That’s why I created Growing Together, a collection of 40 prompts designed to spark conversations for expecting parents. It’s perfect for date nights during pregnancy—no big plans needed, just you, your partner, and time to talk.⁠
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These aren’t just questions—they’re an investment in your connection, your communication, and your intimacy. And honestly, what better gift could you give yourselves—or your future child—than a strong foundation built on love and understanding?⁠
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This collection is not just about now—it’s about the years ahead. If you’re looking for a meaningful gift for yourselves or a loved one this holiday season you can find Growing together on Amazon and in my Etsy shop. Check out my linktree for more details.⁠
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✨ What makes the holidays special for you? What do you want more of, and what do you hope to let go of this year? Let me know in the comments—I’d love to hear!⁠
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#MinimalistChristmas #ConnectionMatters #ExpectingParents⁠
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Picture by the one and only @doulaheartphotography aka Leigh Watson

I resonate deeply with this quote, especially rega

I resonate deeply with this quote, especially regarding our callings in life. Over the past few years, I’ve had several women contact me about their interest in becoming a doula. They often express uncertainty about whether they have what it takes, if there’s even a demand for more doulas, and whether it's possible to make a living from this work. I truly feel those questions. I was terrified when I started my own doula journey—my middle child was just a baby, and I had no idea about the business side of things. I worried that my husband wouldn’t be pleased to be on call with me and that my boss would refuse to let me take vacation days to support births.⁠
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I navigated many of those challenges, only to encounter new ones over the years. But one thing is certain: I’ve never regretted it. Even though some aspects can be hard—like being on call and sometimes missing my kids' birthdays—I still wouldn’t trade these experiences for anything. Being there when a child enters the world and a couple becomes a family is one of the most elating experiences in life.⁠
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For those of you feeling that pull toward this work, know that you’re not alone. I want to support you by answering your questions about what it takes to be a doula, the need for more doulas in our world, and whether it’s possible to make a living in this profession.⁠
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That’s why I’m planning to create an ebook or a webinar to share insights and guidance! I’d love to hear what you want to know. What questions do you have about becoming a doula? Drop them in the comments or send me a DM. I would love to cheer you on and help you overcome any fears you might have.⁠
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#becomingadoula #doulalife #oncalllife #lisanichols #wantitmore #calling #youcandoit #weneedmoredoulas #womendeservedoulas #childbirth

🌿 The “Slime Era” 🌿⁠ ⁠ In my last po

🌿 The “Slime Era” 🌿⁠
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In my last post, I mentioned there was more I wanted to share about the kind of change I’ve been going through lately. I’ve been calling it my "slime era"—that phase where things feel messy and uncertain, like the caterpillar turning into mush inside the cocoon.⁠
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This October marks ten years since I got pregnant with my first daughter. Now, as I’m weaning my youngest, I can feel this era of early motherhood coming to an end. It’s bittersweet—beautiful in its way, but also unfamiliar as I step into what comes next.⁠
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I’ve been reflecting on this with my women's circle, and Cynthia Occelli’s words keep coming to mind:⁠
"For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out, and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.”⁠
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I’m trying to trust that this messy phase is part of becoming something new—something stronger, more grounded, and more authentic.⁠
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If you’re in your own version of a “slime era,” know that you’re not alone. We’re all just growing through the mess. 💛⁠
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I want to celebrate my slime era with you by offering a 30% discount on my childbirth and postpartum video class I created for international families in Germany. The class is one of things that I created (heavily pregnant with my third baby) during my early motherhood era, that I am really proud of. If you know anyone who doesn't have access to in person classes in their area, feel free to share the link in my linktree with them ❤️⁠
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#SlimeEra #transformation #MotherhoodJourney #doulalife #GrowthInProgress #weaning #courage #childbirthclass #expatsinmunich #doulalove

It’s been a while since I’ve shared anything h

It’s been a while since I’ve shared anything here, and I feel it’s only fair to acknowledge that. At the start of the year, I had so many plans—launching a podcast, posting regularly, and working on new offerings. But as life tends to do, it took me in different directions.⁠
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The biggest change? We moved. 🥳 Finding a house with a big garden in Munich that we could actually afford, was something that seemed so out of reach, but it happened. Call me crazy, but around the new year I created a vision board with my middle daughter. We cut out tons of beautiful gardens and flowers and fire pits from gardening magazines and hung the whole thing up in our crowded appartment. Two weeks later, I got an email notification for an old house for rent in our neighbourhood with a huge back yard. I still cannot believe our luck. It's been one of my biggest dreams come true and it’s been a huge adjustment. I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on what this new chapter means for us as a family and for me personally.⁠
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And while I didn’t follow through with all the goals I set fro this year, I’m starting to realize that it’s okay to let things evolve in their own time. Sometimes life doesn’t fit into neat timelines, and that’s part of the process.⁠ ⁠
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This quote by Emma Mumford really speaks to me. There was no way, I would have scheduled in several months to move to our dream home. But it is definitely something I learned from this experience: to leave time in my calendars for miracles.⁠
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There’s more to say, but I’ll leave that for the next post, where I’ll talk about a different kind of change I’ve been going through—the messy kind, where it feels like everything is falling apart, but maybe that’s just what growth looks like. 🌱⁠
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#LifeUpdate #NewHome #DoulaJourney #SlowLiving

✨ Embracing New Beginnings ✨⁠ ⁠ The dawn o

✨ Embracing New Beginnings ✨⁠
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The dawn of 2024 brought profound reflections. Turning 40 was a milestone, yet life's fragility hit home when a close family member faced a heart attack over Christmas. Amidst these poignant moments, I realized waiting for the perfect time to follow my dreams was no longer an option.⁠
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With my middle child, I crafted a vision board filled with aspirations – gardens, flowers, and a fireplace symbolizing our dream home. Determined, I set out to refresh my doula website and update neglected pages. A twist of fate during a PHP update crashed everything. Panic set in as the cost to revive it seemed steep.⁠
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Then, a decision echoed: start anew. The process was initially daunting, but as I dove into recreating my website, a newfound joy emerged. Hours turned into an exploration of dreams deferred for years. The challenge was invigorating.⁠
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Now, amidst the colossal reconstruction, I find myself slightly overwhelmed, intimidated by the enormity of the project, yet more alive than ever before. The journey involves creating a newsletter, resurrecting my blog, finally launching a podcast, and unveiling a Patreon page.⁠
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🌐📰🎙️⁠
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Life is a chaotic construction site right now, and I'm navigating through it with passion and purpose. Here's to the thrill of new adventures and the pursuit of dreams! 🔨✨ ⁠
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#NewBeginnings #DreamChaser #PassionProject #LifeIsShort #WebsiteRefresh

Picture by @doulaheart_photography 💗

I am part of an incredible program right now calle

I am part of an incredible program right now called the Mama Mastermind led by the wonderful Gabrielle McDade @the_postpartum_coach⁠
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During the first call I opened up about my struggles to find my way back to doula work after the birth of my third daughter. Probably all working mothers are familiar with the feeling of being torn between their family's needs and their own desires. What is new for me during this parental leave is that my work is not merely a necessity. It is a magnet of its own that has a strong pull on me. ⁠
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Our life is so rich right now, so full of joy and fun. And it is also so chaotic and so utterly exhausting. I find it hard to make time for me and for my work. Asking my husband for more support when he is already juggling more balls than ever before, feels excessive. Getting my daughter into daycare ealier than absolutely necessary just so I can focus on the work I love so much, feels selfish. Eagerly leaving the house on Sunday afternoons to teach childbirth and postpartum classes instead of spending time with my family, feels callous.⁠
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Gabrielle listened and then she gave me an affirmation to chew on: I am unapologetically taking up space.⁠
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First, I had a hard time even wrapping my tongue around those words. Slowly though, I let the meaning sink in. It still doesn't come easy to me to ask for more, be more than my conditioning deems decent and appropriate. But it is easier than it was a year ago, much easier than five years ago. It becomes clearer to me every day that following my heart creates more energy for me and my family that it takes away. And when I see my children do it, then all of a sudden it is not only reasonable but welcome.⁠
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My next childbirth and postpartum class starts April 30, 2023. Thank you Gabrielle for keeping me focused and unapologetic ❤️

#doulasinmünchen #pregnantinmunich #unapologetic #askingformore #childbirthandpostpartumclass #mamamastermind #womensupportingwomen

One of my biggest concerns about having a third ch

One of my biggest concerns about having a third child was that my marriage might suffer again. ⁠
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After the birth of our second daughter I found it extremely challenging to make time and (mental) space for my relationship. At the end of most days I felt so touched out, so empty, that I had nothing to give. This went on for a while and I kept coming up with excuses in my head: no wonder that my libido is gone, I have a newborn/ a baby sleeping in my bed/ a toddler wearing me out and so forth. At some point I realized that none of those things were true anymore. My second "baby" was three years old, sleeping through the night in her own room and not at all keeping me from being intimate with my husband.⁠
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That scared me a lot. I didn't want to accept this state as something inevitable. I wasn't sure how to get out of this mess. At this point I had accumulated so much shame and insecurity that I didn't even know how to start a conversation about it. ⁠
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To my luck, around that time, I found a new friend who also happened to be a relationship coach. One evening I openend up to her and she just listened. She encouraged me to be brave and talk to my partner. And I guess I was lucky again, as my husband also listened. We went on a journey that brought us closer together than ever.⁠
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When I got pregnant with our third my mindset had completely shifted. I knew that prioritizing our relationship was crucial for our family to thrive. And that I needed to give myself some loving attention and energy first, before I could give it to anyone else.⁠
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Today I always encouorage the parents I work with to do something special for their relationship, ideally even before the baby arrives. ⁠
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If you are interested in hearing more about my personal journey, let me know in the comments.⁠
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PS: My friend @awakened_intimacy is still offering her warmth and wisdom. My husband and I worked with Sasha and Moritz for 18 months and I am so thankful for all the tools and impulses we received ❤️⁠
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Picture by @doulaheart_photography
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#awakenedintimacy #sexafterbaby #intimacyduringpregnancy #parentsinlove #doulalove #thirdbaby #pregnantinmunich #childbirthclasses #expatsinmunich

My life has changed a lot over the last nine month

My life has changed a lot over the last nine months. I was on a real high until the birth of my third (and last) baby. I felt confident in my work, confortable in my body and very loved by my friends and family. Then our little girl was born and I re-entered the baby bubble. In many ways it was and is delicious. Her little feet, her cute little noises, her smell, the nursing - I really feel like I can enjoy her so much. I am not as easily unsettled as I was with my first and I am not as exhausted as I was with my second. It is such a joy to see my older children giggling with their baby sister, to witness my husband having his heart melted by her.⁠
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And then there is the other side, that kinda hit me by surprise. My feeling of selfworth decreased with every month of me not working and especially of me not earning money. The more time I spend in my messy appartment with dirty diapers, dinners my kids refused to eat and clothes that don't really fit, the harder it became to imagine that I would ever feel successful again. That I would ever find the perfect balance between my family's needs and my own.⁠
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Trusting that everything will fall into place is still hard sometimes. I still find it difficult to leave my baby, even with her dad. But now, after nine months I feel ready for a different kind of birth. The birth of a new me, who gives herself permission to be unbalanced. Some days will be all about my family, but more and more days will also be about me, the work that I love, the man I love and the things that cheer my heart. ⁠
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In the words of my wonderful coach @the_postpartum_coach: ⁠
I am exactly where I am meant to be ❤️⁠
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#mamamastermind #foreverpostpartum #doula #thirdbaby #pregnantinmunich #gratitude #ninemonths

A dream come true: I had a maternity shoot. ❤️

A dream come true: I had a maternity shoot. ❤️

It was a gigantic desire of mine to have pictures taken of me and my family while being pregnant. I did not allow myself to have that the first and the second time around, but this time we were finally ready.

Kind of last minute on Mother’s day, only one week before my due date, everything fell into place. It did help that we had the perfect photographer who went above and beyond to make it happen for us. She made me and my husband feel totally at ease, let alone the kids who now want to follow in her footsteps: thank you @doulaheart ! I have no words for the gratitude I feel for you and your work.

I will share more of the pictures in the weeks to come, but what I mostly want to share is this: If you have a desire like this, I want to encourage you from the bottom of my heart, allow yourself to follow it.

Those pictures mean so much to me and my suspicion is that their value will only increase as the years go by. Looking at my big belly, now knowing that it is my sweet baby girl in there makes me so incredibly happy. We were all so curious about this little human being growing inside of me and I love how @doulaheart captured this excitement. I couldn’t think of a better investment to honor this pregnancy.

If you are pregnant right now, take a moment to think how you want to celebrate this special time in your life.

As it is hard to get a childbirth class during this time of the year, I am selling my video childbirth and postpartum course with a 33% discount during the whole month of August. The coupon code is SUMMER2022 (see linkinbio). You receive more than 8 hours of short little videos about the perinatal period that cover all kinds of topics such as recommended conversations to have with your partner during pregnancy, coping mechanisms for labor, common interventions in the hospital as well as baby’s eating, sleeping and pooping behaviour just to name a few.

Maybe, taking the time to reflect upon your birth and the time after is exactly what you need to honor your pregnancy.

I wish you all a wonderful summer ☀️

#materinityshoot #pregnantinsummer #childbirthclass #summersale #followyourdesire #soround

After falling off the face of the earth for three

After falling off the face of the earth for three months, I am now feeling into social media again. A lot has happened during that time. I had a baby for instance 😊⁠
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Our third baby girl joined the family nine days after her due date. She is now two months old and it’s already hard to believe that she was ever not here. She brings so much joy to our lives.⁠
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But this post is not about her birth or about being a family of five. This post is about a feeling that is new to me, something I did not experience after the first to births: I miss my work. I miss it so deeply. After going through pregnancy again myself, being overdue and all, I feel the urge to be there for other mothers and their families even more than before.⁠
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Before becoming a doula, I also did like my job. But the second my babies were born I did not think of it at all until the day I had to go back. That is different this time. I want to sit with mothers and their partners and listen to their stories, hear about their hopes and concerns. I want to be there for them while they give birth and hold space for them during the early postpartum days. I want to teach childbirth classes again.⁠
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And at the same time, I cannot imagine being away from my baby. I love carrying and nursing her and the thought of leaving her for more than two hours seems impossible right now.⁠
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I could feel growing concern in my chest: how was I supposed to reconcile doula work with having a small baby plus two other kids? How would I find the time to do anything if I could hardly make time for a shower? ⁠
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continued in comments

There might be such a thing as too many books abou

There might be such a thing as too many books about birth, breastfeeding and the postpartum period, but I have yet to experience that 🙃

#inamaygaskin #birthingfromwithin #givebirthlikeafeminist #amybrown #doulalove #pregnantingermany #tenmoons #thepositivebirthbook #expectingbetter #pregnantingermany #childbirtheducation #birthnerd #ilovebooks

Spent the day walking and planting strawberries on

Spent the day walking and planting strawberries on our balcony. Now the sun is about to set and I find myself enjoying a quiet and peaceful moment with my baby sipping coconut water 🥰

#dueanydaynow #coconutwater #balconylife #pregnantingermany #pregnantin2022 #dolcefarniente #waitingforyou #weloveyoualready #lastdaysofpregnancy

It is really hard to wrap my head around the fact

It is really hard to wrap my head around the fact that I will get to hold a real baby again soon. Not a plastic one and not a baby I get to hold for a couple of minutes during a postpartum visit, but my baby. It feels totally surreal.

Most of the time the predominant feeling is gratitude. At other times I feel anxious. How will the arrival of this child change my life? How will it affect my older children, my marriage, my work? How will it change me?

And then I think of the last two times we became parents. How our daughters enriched our world. They were and still are my teachers making all the areas I need to work on really obvious, showing me what it means to be authentic.

I am so thankful that, on top of the babymoon with my husband, I also got to spend one special day with each of my children last week. Just following their lead felt so lovely. Not needing to go or be anywhere than in the moment with them. I felt honored that they would share their thoughts with me, their dreams and also their worries.

There is this Maya Angelou quote I really love: "Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better."

I have a ton of regrets when I think about the many "mistakes" I made with my children, especially in the first years of parenting. And then I am just grateful for the people, the books, the podcasts that helped me find new ways and do better. Not only for my kids but for myself. Which ends up being the same thing, right? When we feel fulfilled as people, we are also happier mothers and more affectionate partners.

My self-talk is still far from loving on many occasion (for example after almost setting my dear friends' house on fire), but it is better than it has ever been. And every time I look at my children or my big belly, I feel propelled to really love myself better every day. One tiny step at a time.

Picture by @doulaheart

#onestepatatime #thirdchild #doulalove #gratitude #pregnantingermany #birthmatters #childbirthinternational #internationaldoula #mayaangelou #childbirthclass #fulfilledwomen #39weeks

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